All Chapters of Submitting: Chapter 31 - Chapter 40
52 Chapters
Different
I sat up with a jolt, eyes wide and heart pounding against my rib cage. The bubble that I was in popped suddenly, snatched away from the misty tendrils of slumber that was about to consume me slowly in Dimitri's arms as his hand grazing my head, combing through my hair, patted it into place one last time before resting on my waist. He knew something I didn't. A sigh escaped his lips that followed the dead echo of the doorbell as he left my side and stood up facing the pitch black doorway, attentive and aware, with his right hand on top of his left. That and the cold chill that he left me in, made it very clear that I was not about to like whatever was going to happen next and whoever was about to come through that door. It didn't stop me from wanting to have a good view as I stood up as well when a key turning the lock resounded from the hallway as the front door open with a loud squeak and a pair of footsteps walked in the foyer. Their boots clacked against
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Comfort
If I just rolled over and stayed absolutely still, not a single blink, not a single breath, then maybe, just maybe, this will all be over. The urge to cry was so immense, and yet I couldn't even begin to let the crushing sadness take me, before the cracking headache took over and so did the deep nausea as I hurled everything out of my stomach right in front of everyone and on the lush carpet that was unlucky enough to be placed there. Acidity filled the air which further aided to the situation as I unfurled once again with much more vigour that I would have surely fallen into my own mess if Dimitri wouldn't have held my shoulders as soon as he did while also making sure to hold up my hair until I was done. "Here take some tissues." The worry in his voice felt nothing but ridiculous to me. I would have laughed out loud if only Liza wasn't standing at the doorway with horror in her eyes and Ivan's snake of a hand on her shoulder. "I suppose that's enough fun fo
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Sleep
I wonder if being alone would have helped soothe my anxiety and anger. There was the possibility that I could have walked it out in this room or even tried to plan a mini escape and find Liza so that I could talk to her, shake some sense into her but all those possibilities crumbled when Dimitri stepped into the room and locked the door behind him. I turned around slowly, and stared him dead in the eye. The fury I felt was a little too vivid in the air. He saw it, ignored it and walked towards the other side of the bed and laid down on his back with his arms resting on his chest. A deep exhale left his lips as he closed his eyes and prepared to fall asleep.I never experienced such a psychopathic behaviour before.Sure, he did things that were much, much worse. For example, kidna
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Escape
The door closed, leaving the loudest echo I have ever heard. This whole situation felt too surreal as I stopped breathing and looked at Liza, waiting for her to say anything because I couldn't possibly even begin to. The anxiety that trembled me, paralyzed me the same, and the millions of swarming thoughts inside my head made it completely impossible to function."I'm so sorry if these pancakes taste a little too doughy, haha. I don't know how I messed up this simple recipe. I should have added another egg. Or maybe a little more of that baking powder. My measurements are always off, and you know how I hate reading recipes. And-" I knew Liza. It was sort of  a relief to know that some things about her were still same. All this mindless chatter was nothing but her not too sly way of hiding the far more pressing things she wanted to say."I missed the silly mistakes you make when you cook. It always made me smile." And did smile as I looked at her sad eyes that trie
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Shattered
Shattered.Perhaps not physically, but it felt like every bone in my body had crumbled to jagged shards. Like huge pieces of gravel with sharp, pointed edges. No, it didn't hurt but felt immensely heavy instead. All this weight. This heaviness, that possessed me, left no room for breathing, let alone any movement. I wondered how I was alive at all.Then perhaps I was in a nightmare. And that made me happy because this will be over soon."The weather today is nice." I closed my eyes, trying to shut the tears in. The slap of reality is never too kind.Wind blew softly through the leaves when I opened my eyes again. While the dusky sky, a shade of faded pink, looked like dawn. Or was it dawn? Time had slipped away, just like everything else in my grasp."You have to be very lucky to have such pleasant weather."The sun shined warmly, not the brightest, as the wisps of clouds lingered in the blue sky. Wind whispered through them, the barren bran
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Mean
Black for men and red for women. A strange norm that has been followed universally, which distinctively showcased the supposed beauty of those two genders in settings that are anything but casual and loud. It defined the event more, and addressed the general agenda of how the night is going to progress.  I looked down at myself, wondering if I was wearing or had been made to wear anything like that, but to my relief I was still in my comfortable sweatshirt and sweatpants in grey. Hair still oily and dirty from the several days of unwashed heaviness, skin dry, lips cracked, pale.  Such a contrast to the rest of the people in the room as they gathered round the table in their neat and polished attire, which can be achieved only through practiced care. It made sense now as I understood why I was let to be
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Prop
Their laughter echoed against the walls of the room as music still played softly with the crackle of fire in the warm fireplace and delicate snow falling outside. The candles on the table were almost at its ends and so was this awfully unbearable dinner as they chatted on an empty table after dinner while I sat there, hands still tied up and completely ignored. With my head held down, I could do nothing but endure this painful moment. My only solace, this obnoxious dinner, like every other thing, will pass away in time. The only cost being patience.“I mean, how could you be so stupid? Chasing the very thing that you should be running away from! Hah!” Ivan, with his self sprawled against the chair a lot less elegantly, commented at a previous remark which I wasn't quite following at all.The plates and dishes were all cleared off the table now. What remained now were crystal tumblers for two and a bottle of a whisky which looked nothing
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Wind
A lone tear dripped down my cheek while the unwavering smirk still remained, coronated on my face. The jab that I received was hurtful indeed, but I was not going to let it kick me down. I could do this all day and night. Scream profanities at them, break them inside with jabs of my own and oh even if they didn’t show it outside, I knew that they were getting hurt all the same. Them being better at suppressing their emotions is the only field in which I would accept defeat. These men made up of dead and unemphatic matter are hard to come by, but just my luck that I was forced to live and be around two of them.“Oh, but poor Ivan, aren’t you the same? Aren’t you lonely as well? You think these two people sitting here, talking with you, like you? You think that they are spending time with you because you are his brother and I don’t even know what is happening between you two, but nonetheless, do you think that they prefer being around you
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Glance
“You are seriously asking that?’ Perhaps Dimitri’s question was not meant to be heard by me. It was addressed more to himself than to me, but I was still on an adrenaline rush, and I was not going to drop any chance to express my opinions. This kind of fuelled energy came to me after a long time in the form of fiery rage and needless to say, it was a lot easier to carry than the awful heaviness.This adrenaline rush, excitement at the sheerest spark of hope was shocking to me. It explained how puny us humans are, who get swayed so easily if a prospect of something favourable comes up. And I was no different.Dimitri shut the door behind him as quietly as he could and walked away with squeaking floorboards in his wake. A clear indication that the path was clear but too risky to tread on at the moment. All the liars were still awake and aware. I needed them to be asleep so that I could stealthily walk away from here without being caught. At least he was
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Broken
My heart pounded in my chest so loudly that I could almost hear it thump louder than the old floorboards underneath my feet. Cold and merciless as I stepped on them. It was funny or rather surprising how I was sweating so profusely even in  this biting chill of the night. It’s definitely going to be much more cold outside, but that is far more bearable than being trapped in this house even for a second. I reached the stairs and stopped, trying to listen for the slightest bit of noise in the still air that would give me an indication of my failure at being stealthy. What if they are still awake? What if their sleep is too light that breaks at the slightest bit of commotion? What if all of this is somehow their plan to punish me for my earlier indiscipline? Nothing. Absolutely nothing was heard as the seconds ticked by into minutes and moments of anxious d
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