Chapter 2

I woke up to my phone ringing the next morning and the bed cold beside me.

“Hello?” I croaked into the phone, rubbing my eyes with my fingers.

“Did I wake you?” A snide voice made me sit up in alert. The sleep vanished from my eyes and I steeled my heart against the onslaught of insults about to come.

“N – No – I was awake,” I stuttered, getting out of bed like a guilty child.

“Oh ho, you think you can lie to me?” My mate’s mother snorted. “This is why you do not have a child. What responsible woman sleeps till nine in the morning?” She exclaimed and I winced, pulling the phone from my ear.

“Mum –“ I tried to explain but she cut me off.

“No. No! Let me finish! I heard you visited another fraudster yesterday so tell me, are you pregnant yet?” My throat tightened. I wanted to hide under the bed from the shame that washed over me. “Have you received a magical baby now?” She mocked. My throat dried up and my chest constricted.

“Mum –“ I started again but she cut me off with a growl that stunned me into silence.

“You’ve been mated to my son for over five years yet there is nothing to show for it.” Familiar words poured from her mouth. I hardened my heart but it was useless. Her words pierced deep into my heart.

“Mum, we – we are trying,” I explained but she snorted, the sound derisive and scornful.

“Mum? Mum!? Who is your mother? A barren woman like you can never come from me.”

“Mum!” I exclaimed, my mouth dropping open.

“Shut up! I said I am not your mother!” She exclaimed. “I knew from the minute he picked you that he was making a mistake but he refused to listen now look at the shame and disgrace you have brought to our family! Even his younger sister who has been mated less than a year is already expecting a child!” She yelled at me. I pictured her red and angry face through the tears gathered in my eyes. “Do you have a rock for a womb? You are nothing but bad luck! If you can’t give him an heir then leave him alone!”

“You –“ I bit my lip.

“Yes, I said it! Leave my son alone! Leave my family alone! You are unlucky so do us a favour and leave him!” She ended the call with that and for a long time after, I held the phone to my ear and replayed her words in my head.

Leave Jackson.

It would not be the first time she asked me to leave him. Even before we mated, Luna Martha never liked me but I loved Jackson.

When I heard the word ‘perfect,’ my mind always went to him. With his sandy blonde hair and blue eyes, his broad shoulders and his tall, lean build, he was a hard man to dislike. His looks coupled with his easy-going personality made him even more perfect. He smiled a lot and was genuinely kind. I loved Jackson before I understood what love meant so when he turned twenty-two and still hadn’t found his mate, I jumped for joy when he chose me.

Despite how much backlash he got from his mother for choosing me, he defended me. He loved me and I loved him. I considered myself lucky to be loved by a man like him. Even when people started to comment on my flat stomach, he stood by me but ever since a few months ago, things changed. I could not even say what happened. I just felt him pulling away from me.

The thought of life without Jackson filled me with a sort of fear that I could not explain. I gave up everything to be with him. I chose him over my dream college and dedicated myself to being the perfect Luna for him. If I lost Jackson –

I knew I was losing him and I knew the only thing amiss in our relationship was a child so I tried harder to conceive. Still, the goddess never looked my way once. The doctors said everything was fine. We were a normal couple so why couldn’t we have kids?

While I tried to get started with my day despite the harsh words that woke me and the building pain below my navel, my phone rang again. ‘Janet’ flashed on my screen and I sighed.

“Hello?” I swallowed thickly as my best friend’s voice filled my ear. Janet was my best friend and Jackson’s younger sister. We were inseparable as children but our relationship had become strained in the past few months.

“I hope you don’t feel bad,” she said when I couldn’t return her greeting. “Mum just called and I know she said some hurtful words but she doesn’t mean them,” she said and I let out a hoarse laugh.

“She meant every word she said,” I muttered, folding my legs underneath me as I sat, pressing down on my stomach.

“No, don’t take her words to heart, Channy. Mum is anxious, that’s all. You know things are hard for us all. Jackson is the Alpha. He needs an heir to secure his position.” I laughed out loud.

Things were hard for them all? I was the one who had to visit the doctors for all sorts of invasive tests, take a hundred different tablets, kneel until my knees peeled at the temple and drag a deer up a mountain and drink its blood. Things were tough for everyone but I was the one who had to endure the scornful looks from the pack members. I was the one at the receiving end of my mother-in-law’s insults. I was the one who lived in constant fear of the future and anguish at how my mate treated me. If things were hard for everyone then what would I say? Were they easy for me? Was anyone as anxious as I was for a child?

“Have I not tried my best?” I could not stop bitterness from leaking into my tone. “I have visited all the doctors in this region. The doctors say everything is fine with me so –“

“Are you implying that Jackson is the problem here?” Janet cut me off with a sharp tone and I blinked.

“No?” I asked in confusion. Although he had only visited the hospital with me once, the doctor said then that nothing was wrong with Jackson either.

“No, it sounds like you are saying my brother is the one with the problem here,” Janet growled.

“I never said that,” I exclaimed, pulling at my hair in frustration. “It’s just – maybe the right time –“

“What right time?” She cut me off again. “Jackie chose you because he needed a mate to bear his children. He is almost thirty years old without a child! What time will he raise his children? When he is old and weak? Do you realize the earlier he has a child, the earlier he can retire? Do you want him to lead the pack until he is old and weary!?” She exclaimed.

“No – I just –“ My brows furrowed at the anger in her tone. “Janet, why are you sounding like this?" I asked in confusion, pulling the phone away from my ear to check the caller id.

“Look, we have all been patient enough. I am your friend so I want what’s best for you, okay? Try to conceive as soon as possible if you care about your marriage.” I listened to the dial tone as she ended the call.

‘How long?’ I muttered to myself as my eyes stung. ‘How long will it take?’ I touched my flat belly and gritted my teeth as a sob threatened to break out. I closed my eyes to hold back the tears gathering then my stomach turned and I rushed to the bathroom to throw up.

My back touched the cold tile of the bathroom wall and I let the tears fall. Burying my head between my knees, I screamed until I became breathless. I screamed until my throat felt too raw for me to continue, until my jaw hurt. My mind flashed to the previous night and my skin crawled. I felt cheap, dirty and disgusting.  

My stomach lurched again and I leaned over the toilet as I retched, alone in the big house, alone and afraid of the future.

 Pain ripped my insides and tears dripped out the corners of my eyes. I clenched and unclenched my fists, trying to be strong but the pain intensified and I ended up bawling like a baby.

The world seemed to be closing in on me. My hands and legs shook as I pushed myself to my feet. I washed my face and looked back at the ghost-like creature staring back at me with tired red eyes.

Another sharp pain pierced my stomach and I gasped. A wave of dizziness swept through me and I decided then that I had to go to the hospital. The hospital was a nightmare for me. I hated the hospital but as a sharp pain tore at my insides, I knew I had to go so I called my mate.

I called him the first time, the second and then the third. I called him as I panted for breath. I must have called him too many times because when I dialled him again, his line had been turned off.

I drove myself to the hospital.

One hand on the wheel and the other cradling my stomach, I drove myself to the hospital, hoping and praying not to crash the car.

“The gynaecologist is not – ” the receptionist said as soon as I walked in. “Hey – Luna – Are you okay?” She rushed out of her seat. It was a silly question to ask but I opened my mouth in a gasp.

“Any doctor –“ I could not complete my sentence as the ground rushed up to meet me.