Raina
With each passing minute, my anxiety and fear grew. I should be feeling positive, but I don't. Rounding around the sacred fire every promise we uttered to hold each other in sickness, cherish each other, love each other, bring happiness into our lives, to be faithful to each other. Filled trepidation in my veins.Every promise let out from his mouth was filled with confidence and sincerity. Not once did his voice shake. And here I am every vow I took with nervousness, my voice trembling with apprehension.I stood there with my now husband touching elders' feet and taking blessings to have a blissful married life. Not many people were invited. Only family and some of the family friends. My wedding is an intimate ceremony. Not that I am complaining."Raina will you come with me for a minute". I look at Trupti my eldest sister. And nodded. I glanced at my husband who was busy , talking to his aunt. I sighed, he wouldn't even notice if I would go away forever."What"? I ask. My sister who looks exactly like mama smiled at me. Her dark brown eyes glistened with tears. "Mummy was right you are the most beautiful bride in this world Raina, you look so pretty in this maroon lehenga". She says through tears and tried to grab my hands.I jerked my hands off her hold and glared at her. I don't care if she is my eldest sister because right now I am angry and hurt. I thought at least she would help me to convince mama and dad to stop this marriage but she didn't."Ray, please for how long you will be angry with me? I am sorry but it is for your own good. You know about mummy's condition..." I held my hand in front of her stopping her to say anything further.She looks at me shaking her head, tears rolling down from her cheeks. I gritted my teeth and walked out. My heart hurts seeing her cry and I know I am being dramatic but at this point, I don't even care. Because no one is with me. Everyone is adamant to throw me out.I walked toward the main hall of our home and saw my husband sitting there alone doing something on his phone. I slowly made my way toward him and sat beside him.I rolled my head to look at him, to admire him from close because he is looking so, so good today. I know I shouldn't say this but I could see Krishna in him. His smooth clean shaved face, that damn pointed nose, and chiseled jaw. And this maroon sherwani makes him look like a king. My king."Done staring at me wife, if yes then maybe we should depart". My breath hitched as he looks at me with an intense gaze. His eyes traveled from my face to my body and I swear I saw the glint of appreciation in his eyes.He got up from the sofa and walked away. My cheeks heat up, he caught me staring at him. But no one can help when a man like him becomes your husband.It's the first time he has talked or said something to me in two years other than vows. But I think it's a good sign. I know I never wanted to marry and marrying Raghav will bring so many consequences.But I am ready, I will not let him down again. No matter what was the reason for our marriage, but I am determined to make it work.I watched the interaction between my family and Agastya and his family. Thank God his brother is not here. Only his mother and father and aunt are here. My wedding could be the most intimate Indian wedding which was held in our home. With barely thirty people.But hey, it's not done yet, we still have our reception which is scheduled after three days from today. And that will be a big ceremony.I sighed and rested my head on the sofa. I feel tired. There is no excitement in me. "Raina, it's time to go". I narrowed my eyes at my mother. "Where?" I ask.She bit her lips and intake a deep breath. "Your new home". She whispers, her voice choked as if she is about to cry. My heart thumped in my chest loudly, my new home."What are you saying mama?" anxiety kicked in my body with a force. My hands start to tremble. "Raina, you are married now, you have to...your husband is waiting," she says in a hard voice.Tears gathered in my eyes, I tried to blink them back but those damn traitors couldn't even wait for some time before spilling out. I close my eyes and heaved a sigh."Prepare, for the Farewell mama, I need to get out of here, before you all throw me out". I gritted out getting up from the sofa and walked away from her.This was the right way, it has to be done someday. They couldn't bear my burden their whole life.I look into my dad's eyes same as mine. He patted my shoulder but didn't pull me to his chest like he always does. He is the man I love the most, my protector. He loves me more than anything and anyone even more than he loves mom. But today his cold behavior shattered me. But I understand him and his reluctance towards me.I glance at my family, and none of them had tears, oh, how can I forget they are eager to send me away?A loud sob escaped from my throat as my mother wrapped me in her warm embrace."You are going to rock, my baby girl". She says and kissed my temple. I look into her eyes, she was smiling through her tears. She cupped my cheeks. Neither of us, wanted to let go. We pulled away and just like every other bride I left the home where I grew up. Which has seen my first steps to my teenage years.Summer breeze whipped on my face as I stared out the window. Enormous buildings, billboards, and flats of the Richest colony of Chicago went past us.There was an eerie silence that lingered in the car. My husband didn't even talk to me. He is so distant and I feel so lonely. I don't know how will I make things better between us.My wedding has to be the weirdest in the world , after leaving my ' parents home' we directly went to my in-law's home where my mother-in-law performed all the rituals. And now I and my husband is going to our home because according to him he has a job to do. He doesn't like being away from his home on working days.So, here we are driving to our home. Things are changed now. I am no more Raina Aaron, I am Raina Murad now. Wife of Dr. Agastya Murad. Oh , sorry Mr. Grumpy Murad.I have to change my way of living. I have to repair my broken wings so as like a real butterfly I can spread colors in my new home and bring only happiness in our lives. I am ready to Begin Again with him.AgastyaThe car came to the halt in front of my apartment. Finally, I heaved a relaxed sigh. "We have reached," I say and unlocked the car door and opened it. I stepped out of the car and started walking towards my home. Which was still decorated in all shimmery fairy lights and flowers.I unlocked the door and stepped inside the home. At least, the insides look normal. My home is small with two rooms on the first floor and three on the ground. But it does have all the luxorious along with maroon mahogany furniture. "Our home is pretty". I gulped as I heard her sweet voice. Our home. About two years ago I saw the dream that one day I will have my own home with the woman I love. That will be ours. And unfortunately, that dream came true today. Only this time I didn't want to share this home with her. If it wasn't for her mother who almost begged me to marry her daughter I would have never married the woman who broke me first.I climbed the stairs and walked to my room. I pick out my n
Raina~ I applied khol in my eyes, making my hazel green eyes look electric. There is a thing about makeup of married woman, it makes you look powerful and beautiful. I touched my bare neck, red rashes were still looking as if I have dusted pink blush. I sighed and pick the diamond necklace adorned with ruby beads and wore it. It was the wedding gift from Tara. I glance at my reflection in the mirror. My brown hair was tied into a neat sleek bun and the flower clip was securely pinned on the bun. My khol-clad eyes looked more electric and prominent. My lips were tainted with a maroon lipstick. I pick out the black kitty heels in contrast to the color of my blush pink silk gown with a modest neck line. I look good, I can rock my reception, and I can face people. I chanted these words like a mantra, until I heard the car honk. I hurriedly walked out of my room and stopped dead on track as I watched my husband talking to someone on the phone. There was an angry frown on his face. H
~Raina~A week ago I had the feeling, that my husband could possibly have feelings for me. But oh boy, how wrong I was. My husband is still the Doctor grumpy Murad who doesn't give a shit about what I do.He didn't even tell me to make him breakfast again because I didn't make him for the first day. Back at home, I have never even turned on the gas how could I make something here? I don't know about household work."Don't think too much, Raina. One day you will make my Gus happy by making his favorite food" my mother-in-law says and blew air on the spoon and then gave it to me to taste.The hot spicy taste of sause burst on my taste buds. "Hmm, it's tasty mummy". I say and my mother-in-law smiled at me and got back to her work.Today, some of the international doctors are coming to Agastya's home for dinner, and my husband dearest has asked my mother-in-law for help because his wife is not capable enough. And, sadly it's true."You go get ready, and wear something in green, it's Gus's
Raina~Tying up my Carmel hair into a high bun, I stepped into the jacuzzi and slid myself into the lukewarm water infused with lily-scented water bombs. I closed my eyes and rested my head, listening to Gracie Abrams, it's okay, the pain will go away soon, don't worry just relax. My mouth stretched into a smile as I could still hear the soothing yet worried voice of my husband in the back of my head. The whole night, I slept in his arms and he continued to gently massage my belly to soothe me from the pain, I don't even know if he slept or not but the one thing I am sure of that he was there with me the whole night. I have craved the caring touch of another human being for two years, no one was there for me but now I have someone who would care for me despite everything.Last night I pulled down the guard he was holding up against me and his worried eyes and calm actions proved that he could handle me in every situation. And I must thank my parents for taking this decision for me,
Raina~ I swim across the pool, swinging my hands and flapping my legs in the water, the chill breeze along with cold water splashed over my face from time to time, giving me the perfect release for dopamine.Night swimming is a good stress reliever, the relaxation it gives in your body and mind is just commendable. I took a long breath and ducked into the water, holding my breath I let myself free, free of any motion and movement. I closed my eyes as I float, it's so serene out here, away from the chaos of my life. Away from the painful memories, away from him. It may be temporary, but sometimes temporary is the only thing that works in your life, this short period gives you, a hefty amount of time to think about the future, for your dreams.But alas! I think I don't even deserve that, I swam to the edge of the pool as I felt him dipping in. I felt him swim past me, the splash of water from his movement touched my back. I stood there, drinking my avocado and berries smoothie, he d
Raina~I let the tears fall from the corner of my eyes, letting the pillow soak them I should have never agreed to let my son marry you, You are a stupid bitch those words are still haunting me. But the words from my mother in law doesn't affect me as much as the sad eyes of Agastya, do you care? How can a little phrase be so painful? And why would he feel like that? I never told him to eat that damn food. Those hazel eyes are still flashing across my eyes every now and then, I am just so unable to get rid of them and it's hurting me. Did he think that I wouldn't care? I do care, I care a lot. He must have also thought that I have done all of this intentionally, but it's not true, I can never hurt anyone like this, not to the extent where their life is at risk. I am not that insensitive. With shaky hands, I grab my mobile and turned it on. So many missed calls from, Mom and my sister but none from Agastya's family. Not even Kaia called me. Agastya has been living at his parent's
Raina~ I have never been a natural girl, all I do is try, try, and try. A lot of people judge me for who I am or the way I am. They say, whatever happened to me was my mistake and it should have made me sensible and mature now. But to their discontent, it made me more obnoxious and boastful. I think sadness is the only real thing in my life that exists and every other thing is an illusion. The way I have adopted sadness into every pore of my body and soul, I don't think any sort of happiness could remove it. Even though I do try to change and be good but it all goes into vain, so why try either? It's not like my efforts would make any dent in Agastya's hatred for me. He will always and forever hate me with every fiber of his body. Damn, he can't even bear to see my face. For the past two weeks, since he has come to his home, he has denied to see me. He leave for the hospital, before I wake up, he eat his dinner in his room, it feels like even the existence of my name make him re
♡Raina♡I injected insulin into my abdomen and wiped the tears from my cheeks. I closed my medical box, putting it aside. I lay on the bed and rested my head on the pillow.With shaky hands, I once again read the message on my phone. 'See you soon, Ray' I tossed the phone aside and closed my eyes letting tears fall from the corner of my eyes.I was seventeen, full of life and dreams. And one stupid decision ruined my life. Agastya, the sweet Gus purposed to me, but I was stupid enough to reject him just to come into a relationship with his elder brother.Angus Murad, an engineer, ten years older than me, was hired by my school. He was handsome, tall, and dark. But I never felt any attraction towards him. I was still young.He approached me and would talk to me sweetly. My friends liked him and slowly I started liking him too. C'mon Raina, look at him he is so dashing and all set in his career. And he likes you, what more do you want? My friend said and just like a fool I was, I agree