Chapter 3

Sekina

The days that followed were hollow and guilt-ridden.

I could not focus on anything other than my frantic heartbeat, and the sweat pooling in my palms each time someone stared at me too long, as if they knew what I had done.

Simone, three-time winner of Cole University's Most Beautiful, with her luscious, long brown hair and sky blue eyes —her pale skin was where our similarities ended— and Sean, the most gorgeous guy in the school, were the star couple. Everyone drooled over what they had, and if news made it out that I had ruined it…

I would be crucified. That is, if Simone didn't do it first.

“Salvador?” The professor's crisp voice cut into my thoughts. I jolted back to the present, where I stood on the podium in front of the entire hall of students. “Are we supposed to wait all day for you to begin?”

Low bursts of laughter rippled through the hall.

I had prepared for this presentation for weeks, yet now I stood, completely blank and unfocused. I swallowed hard, and glanced through the faces jeering at me. My anxiety peaked at an all-time high because, for the life of me, I couldn't remember a thing.

“Um, I —” My laptop slipped from my sweaty palms and crashed to the floor.

The laughter this time was loud and jarring. Trembling, I picked it up and wished I could evaporate into thin air.

“Seems like a bad case of nerves, Salvador.” The professor said, “Your sister has always been the more confident one. Don't worry, you'll have another chance to redeem yourself. Next!”

After that humiliation, I didn't have in me to go through the rest of the day. Taking care to avoid all the places Luca might be, I trudged to the parking lot and got into my car. This was one of the days I didn't even want to drive, but only my sister had a personal chauffeur.

She had earned it, my father had said. Make us proud and you'll get one too, Mother had added.

Talk about picking favorites. I scoffed and curved out of the parking. The mansion was empty when I stepped in, just like the past three days. Aside from the few staff members silently moving around, like ghosts, there were no signs of life.

Our parents had gone on a three-day trip to Bali, and of course, they had taken Simone with them. She was the heiress to the family's billion-dollar company, although she was younger. I didn't care about the company, or the luxury trips. I only wished they didn't go out of their way to make me feel bad for simply existing.

I was turning the doorknob of the library when I heard a distressed voice calling out to me.

“Miss Sekina?”

It was Lumere, my father's consigliere, in his grey suit. But his face was twisted in agony, eyes shining with an emotion that sent chills down my spine. He was always friendly, chatty, and smiley towards me. But not today. I already sensed that something terrible had happened.

“What's wrong, Lumere?” I turned to face him, eyebrows scrunched.

His fingers were clasped, “It's…I'm so sorry, that I have to be the one to break such bad news to this, miss.” He shook his head sorrowfully. “It's your family. They were involved in a ghastly car crash this morning, on their way back from the airport. No one survived.”

The words were like a reverberating knell between us. I stared at him, for a long moment, because those words had only bounced off my head.

“Your uncles and other relatives are taking care of things, making funeral arrangements.” He continued, “A few of them are on their way here, to console you, and make sure you're holding up well. Once again, I'm so sorry, Miss. I'm here if you need someone to talk to.”

Only when he left did I allow myself to collapse.

My parents were dead. Simone was dead, and the last thing I had done was betray her. Sudden tears welled up in my eyes, and sobs poured out, scouring through my throat. Not one of pain, because they were never good to me. But one of sorrow and mourning.

Because of what I had lost. People who shared my blood. People who I could call family. My parents who I still hoped could one day begin to love me as much as they loved Simone. Now that they were dead, that hope was dashed.

I was truly alone in this world.

The morning of the funeral, two weeks later, was cold and gloomy. It didn't help that I was sick, throwing up the contents of my stomach into the toilet bowl till I was heaving up nothing.

I had been sick for days. Nausea, with constant cramping in my lower back.

These were symptoms I couldn't recognize. I was not on my period, and I didn't have the flu. I sat there on the bathroom floor, wondering if it was just the grief of losing my family until a terrible thought crossed my mind.

“No,” I whispered, raising my hands to my lips in horror. “No, no, it can't be...”

I tried to remember the night of the GetdirtyatCove party, even though most of the memories had been repressed because they were too hurtful. Sean and I had been too drunk to use any protection, and I had not been on any birth control since my love life was non-existent.

But there was no way I could be—

“No, please, no!” I jumped to my feet and rushed into Simone's room.

It had not been cleared yet, and I felt sick rifling through the things of my dead sister, but she had a bunch of disposable pregnancy tests. I knew because she was always flaunting her expertise in avoiding pregnancy despite her active sexual life with Sean.

A surge of nausea hit me again.

Holding my stomach in pure panic, I moved into her bathroom and peed on the stick. It was harrowing for a few minutes as I waited for the results. My entire body was rigid, trying so hard to keep breathing before I passed out from the tension.

After enough time had passed, I grabbed the stick, and took a tentative glance, body flashing hot and cold at once.

Two red lines had appeared boldly on the screen, signing the end of my life as I knew it.

I was pregnant.

I was pregnant for Sean Remington, the man I loved, who felt nothing but disgust and hate for me.