Chapter #5

It was Ed... He was calling me, a tear escaped from my eye and fall on the screen, staring at the screen and his name. My stomach knots and I knew Why Ed is calling me. Heather and Robin told him about everything and I am not that courageous to pick up the call and talk to him. I let the phone ring until it became silent.

I thought about, Why do I even try? No one loves me, and no one will help me. I wish there was something I could do to change my life, but nothing can be done. I guess it is time for me to give up. I'm such a loser. No one likes me; my

life is useless. I don't know why I even try. Every good thing I've ever had, I've either ruined or lost. Nothing good ever happens to me. What is wrong with me? Why can't I be happy? Sometimes it's hard to smile through the tears. Life hasn't been kind to me, and I don't expect it will ever be. I don't deserve happiness. I can never be happy. I

wish I could just go away forever.

" Come on, Heather don't give up. We are almost there," I heard Robin's voice coming from, getting up I went to look for her but in a short amount of time I find them climbing the five hundred stairs. Heather is behind her.

I am surprised to see them here and what exactly they are doing. I thought in my head.

" ROBIN, HEATHER WHAT ARE YOU DOING GUYS?" I said out loud and they both raise their heads to see me waving my hands.

" Look, Heather, she is there. I told you will be here," Robin told Heather.

" I am not blind Robin, I can see her," Heather rolled her eyes.

" Stas, wait for us. We are coming to you."

She yelled back to me like there is a way out of there besides jumping off the cliff and commenting suicide. Slowly, they have finally reached the top.

" How did you find me?" I ask them but they are out of breath. Like, they've been running a marathon for the past two days.

" How do you look so fine? after climbing these hundreds of steps," Robin ask me while huffing. And before I could answer her she continue by saying, " Nevermind, we track you through your phone,"

I realized I have a tracker in my phone and it sent my location to my friends.

" I just totally forgot about it," I answer Robin.

" Why did you run away?" Heather ask me.

" What do you expect me to do? watch Ed with you. And Do you not seen it? he didn't even look at me. Everyone like pretty things and I was never pretty. I am not that courageous to tell him the truth. He deserves to be happy and I don't want him to get hurt because of my stupid lie."

" So, what do you want us to do? shut our eyes and ears and act as if nothing happens. I am sorry but I can't do that. And I don't know about Robin but I have made my decision," Heather said and wraps her arms around herself like she is extremely mad I reconsider her words and realize that she hadn't told Ed the truth.

" You didn't tell him the truth," I ask Heather.

" Of, course not. We had to excuse him and left to find you. But that doesn't mean I will not tell him the truth," she added and Robin is listening quietly to us.

" You don't have to tell him the truth... I pause... I will tell him the truth,"

" Seriously, you are not joking?" she asks me in disbelief.

" No, I am not joking Heather. I am going to tell him the truth. I will fix everything that I messed up," I assure her.

" Well, that was easier than I thought, and then call him and tell him the truth. End this chapter now," Heather tells me to do something which I am not capable of but I have an idea in my idea.

" I will tell him but... I take a pause and knew what I am going to say next won't set too well but this is the only idea I can think of right.

" But what?" Heather ask me.

" I- I will tell Ed the truth but when he returns to Milan because I can't face him. Until then you have to keep that secret." I told Heather. She doesn't look pleased with what I have said.

" WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? I WILL NOT BE A PART OF THIS SHIT" She raise her voice which is justified because I am asking her to do something crazy.

" She is right, you have lost your mind and what is the point of doing this? if you eventually will tell him the truth and then you will hurt him even more." Robin finally speaks.

" I am not asking you for your kidney, I am just asking you to help me for just a couple of days. Are you, not my friend? friend will do anything and you guys just can't lie for me. I swear on my Nanna."

" I can't believe it, you are saying this. I will not agree to your plan. And I will not become part of this," Heather said.

" If you won't agree then... I... I will jump off the cliff right now and kill myself. And you are the only one who is present. And the cops will immediately think that you are the one who pushed me." I make a seething remark.

" WHAT? YOU ARE BLACKMAILING US!"

" NO! I am just asking you to help me and if you won't do it then just tell me I will end my life here." I said and just hope that they will agree to help me. They both looked at each other and communicate something with their eyes which I don't understand.

" Fine, I will help you but promise me you will tell him the truth," Heather said and it feels like music to my ear I threw my arms around them and pulled them into the hug.

" You are the best friend I have ever had, Thank you so much."

Heather pushed me away from her and I got little excited but I control myself. Heather doesn't look happy and Robin try to break the ice between us by saying, " Are you guys planning to stay here all night?

" No, I think, we should leave. It is getting late now," I said and Robin agreed on it. She begin to leave

The Next Morning,

KNOCK…KNOCK…KNOCK

I wake suddenly, every thought in high definition. My eyes take in every ray of light and without a doubt, I know I've slept too long. But I don't want to wake up to face another job rejection. Though my eyes are open I can't think of why; my heart is pounding, and my mind is empty. It's as if a hypodermic of adrenaline has been emptied into my carotid. I strain into the utter darkness, my breathing rate beginning to steady.

I hear another knock on the door and I growl in frustration.

" GO AWAY BILLY! LET ME SLEEP!" I yell out loud.

Billy, my psychotic roommate won't see me happy in any way, shape, form, or size. I don't know what is his problem with me. He never let me take a breath of peace. He had only one purpose in life to annoy me. At night, he blasts his crappy music and in the morning he makes an excuse to use his rock puck instruments next to my ear holes.

I hate every second of living under the same roof as him.

He again knocks on the door and this time I get frustrated and peel myself up from my warm bed in agony. I storm towards the door, with groggy eyes. Still, half asleep.

I reach out for the doorknob and see, Billy, standing at my doorway, looking like a Vikings and Gorilla mixture. Long hair logs coming down to his shoulders and

ginger-dye beard. He shows me his white teeth by spreading his lips. Which seriously, makes me cringe.

" Billy, I am begging you, just for one day let me sleep peacefully. I am just so tired of this shit. I will kill you if you won't let me sleep." I warn him and slam the door in his face but before I could return to bed. He again knocks on the door and I open the door.

" Argh! What's wrong with you?" I said.

" Crazy lady, before you shut the door in my face. I wanted to tell you that Mrs, Bennett is waiting for you downstairs."

My eyes popped out of my eye socket out of horror.

" Mrs, Bennett... Fuck me... No one will save me from this biddy woman." I mumble some words out.

Mrs, Bennett aka the biddy. She is our landlord and she is the most miser person you have ever come across in your entire life. Everyone was scared of her in the neighborhood. She is like a lady don of the area and she is a scary-looking woman. And for me, she came as an angel of death because I haven't paid my four-month rent. I've been avoiding biddy for two months because each time we encounter each other she asked me for her rent and I make every possible excuse to dodge her. But today looks like I've run out of excuses. Plus, she is Heather's stepmother.

" What do I say to her?" He asks me.

" Please, Billy don't tell me you told biddy that I am at home," I ask him, hoping to receive my desired answer from him but my rotten luck would never see me happy.

" You should inform me that before I apprise her about you."

My face mottled with anger, I release it with a curse.

" YOU! BLOODY GOOSE! WHY DO YOU WANT TO TURN MY LIFE INTO HELL?" I scream at him.

" Shhhh... she will hear you. And what do you expect me to do? kill biddy for you and go to jail. Nope, I wouldn't do it for you."

" No, no, no, I am not telling you to become a murderer but please, just help me. I will do anything for you." I beg him to help me because I don't want to become homeless in this cold weather. I don't want to live on a street with rabies rats and roaches.

A horrifying image of me, wandering around new york, starving, freezing, and most importantly dying from exhaustion. The multiple layers of neglected clothes I haunted through the years did nothing to shelter my body against the cold weather. My stomach growled desperately for food and fantasizing constantly about a huge yummy steak probably did not help.

I immediately shake off my thoughts and desperately, wait for Billy to say something.

" Anything? Okay, I will help you but you have to do all my chores for three months." He said with a huge smirk on his face I can't believe, he is taking advantage of my situation. God will burn him in hell.

" What? For three months! I am not going to wash your dirty underwear for three months. Forget about it."

" Then, I am going to biddy and notify her that you are coming to meet her."

He begins leaving which almost gives me a mini heart attack but I stop him from leaving by jumping in front of him.

" Stop!... I will do your chores but for... only one month." I chew my words.

" What? I didn't hear you correctly. What are you saying you will do my chores for...?"

" Fine, only two months and that's a deal."

He takes two seconds to think about it but he finally agrees to help me and we close the deal and he went downstairs to handle biddy.

I return to the room and slam the door shut. And I feel still worried because I don't trust Billy or biddy. No one can make her a fool. She is a sharp old woman. I bite the nail off of my fingers in tension.

" I just can't sit here and do nothing. What if the lightning strikes me in the face of biddy?" I thought and jumps towards the closet and takes out a baggy shirt and shorts.

I change my clothes and open the window. I look down and thought, if I fall from here, I wouldn't die but maybe I can break some bones.

I pray to God to land me safely down on the ground. I take a deep breath and throw my shoes down in the alley. I cross my legs over to the other side, my legs dangling 15ft above the ground.

I see to my left side the sewerage pipe going all the way down. I gather all my courage and leap towards it. I wrap my arms around it tightly and caught the pipe in between my thighs. I am hugging the pipe like a chimp hanging the tree.

" Come on, Stas, you can do it. Just don't look down and everything will be fine. Slow and steady win the race." I say to myself to motivate myself to do the impossible work.

I begin sliding down, inch by inch. I just keep praying to God to not make me fall. I slowly make it halfway down and reach my neighbor's window her four years old kid Timmy doing her homework and his mother is too busy watching a crappy show, 'The Naked Brothers Band'

Little Timmy sees me through the window and I awkwardly smile at him.

He screams at the top of his lungs and I remember why I hate kids? they're little devils. They just know how to scream for no reason.

I quickly slide down before his mother could see me and calls the cops on me for sneaking into her house. I don't want any more drama in my life.

My feet finally touch the ground and I sigh in relief. I collect my shoes from the ground and put them on.

As I was about to leave I heard someone clear her throat from behind me. As I spin on my heel...

My eyes turn red in horror as I see, Mrs, Bennett aka biddy. She hobbles behind limping slowly, with a brown, worn, wooden cane. Her face looks like a chocolate, wrinkled, worried face, wearing a sleeveless bright pink top and tight faded jeans with leather laces on the sides following the seam, both contouring a voluptuous figure, her black-dyed hair styled short, flat, and to her shoulders. She takes out her glasses from a small hand clutch and wears them to see me.

She is a 50-year-old grown woman but still wants to look like a 20-year-old, Even though I don't dress like her.

" Stassie, what are you doing here?" She asks me which takes me by surprise because biddy never asks me anything except for her money.

.

" I know, it must be hard for you but if you need anything don't hesitate to ask me for help. I would be happy to help you." She says. And I can not believe my eyes… I mean, ears. She is not the biddy I knew maybe she is possessed or something because I have never seen this side of her.

" I will pray for your brother, He is such a wonderful man. God bless him" She says and I find myself in turmoil. Where does my brother come from? And yes, I have a stepbrother who is my father's first and last mistake despite living in the same city we never crossed paths of each other. He got married a couple of years ago with his boss's ex-wife and was blessed with a baby boy. I never met with my nephew and wanted to see him but due to lack of communication with my Liam, it never happens.

" My brother?" I ask her confusingly.

" Yeah, I just found out from Billy that your brother is in the hospital battling cancer. And you are so worried about her medical bills and treatment. I didn't know that I would never ask you for the rent but now, I know so you don't have to pay me the rent… I become so happy that she forgave me for my four-month rent but she continues, " for this month but for your previous four months. When you will pay me the rent"

Does this surprise me? Absolutely, not. I've known biddy for two years and one thing is certain about her. She will take her single penny back even from a dead body.

" Biddy, I mean, I will give your rent by the end of the month. I make a promise to you." I say with a huge fake grin.

" You promised me that before but didn't fulfill it. I don't want to hear any more excuses, pay my rent, or empty the room." She says in a harsh tone.

" My brother is in hospital fighting for his life. And all you care about is your money

old bag. Listen, women if something happens to my brother I will sue you. And where you will take this all money to your grave." I say and point my finger at her.

She looks scared after what I told her. She becomes quiet for a second. And I, on the other side, become happy that it works.

" Okay, okay I will wait for the end of the month and if you don't pay the rent then empty the room before the end of the month," she says and I thought, thank God! At least for now, I prevent biddy from kicking me out of my room but what about tomorrow? I desperately need money as fast as I can but how?

And just when I think, everything will be fine. My brother show out of nowhere, holding a small food container"

" Good morning, stepsister I was just passing your neighborhood and thought to give you this. My wife bakes the cake." He

" Why me every time? Sometimes I feel proud of myself, not because of any success I’ve achieved, but because I’m aware of all the difficulties that I have suffered or gone through.

I’m an eyewitness to all the fear, weakness, frustration, failure, depression, refraction, and bad luck moments that I’ve been through alone and which affected me significantly but never was able to beat me for so long.

This is why I’m proud because I’m here now stronger than yesterday, I'm still able to stand and continue on my way, still following up my dreams, still trying my best to build a better future for me." thought... I cuss Liam why he choose to come to see me right now when he had all these years to come and check up on me.

Biddy, nostrils flare with heat as she shoots a glare at me. And I smile at her nervously. I don't even think twice before deciding to run away.

" Oh, My God, look over there!" I point my finger to the sky and as biddy turns her head. I make a run for my car which is parked on the opposite side of the alley.

And I can hear biddy calling my name out in her showreel voice in the background.

I don't even dare to look around or slow down. I reach for my mini countrymen and unlock it with my shaky fingers. I hop inside and get the hell out of there.